


It's Nice Not to be So Alone

by TweekXCraig



Category: South Park, South Park RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, F/M, Fluff and Smut, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-18
Updated: 2017-11-05
Packaged: 2018-08-23 02:34:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8310505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TweekXCraig/pseuds/TweekXCraig
Summary: Between crippling anxiety and a raging caffeine addiction, Tweek has a hard enough time keeping his heart from exploding. Moving into a house with Craig, before his junior year of college might just do him in. But it's still nice not to be so alone.
Based on the song by Vanessa Carlton, White Houses.





	1. It's Nice Not to Be So Alone

Tweek still remembers everything about their first night in the bungalow. It had been in the beginning of July, and he was getting ready for his junior year of college. A mixture of exhaustion and nerves had him practically vibrating all day before he had left home, and he hadn’t even been bothered enough to unload his mattress from the car when he arrived at his new home. The whole car ride there his mind had raced, making him let out soft, little “gah!”'s and “ack!”’s whenever his imagination got the best of him. What if his roommates were all Mormons coffee was banned from the house? What if they were secretly Underpants Gnomes who were just waiting to rob him and then would leave?

  
Throughout all his wild predictions, one stayed firmly shut in his mind, scaring him too much to even think of the possibility. Finally, as his GPS, which he had stopped to reset and to check the progress of his trip every thirty miles, just in case the government was leading him to an unknown location, notified him he was ten minutes away from his new home, he allowed himself to face his final worry. What if his roommates were homophobic?

  
Pulling up to the bungalow, he noted how much smaller it looked than in the pictures his parents had showed him on the Internet. Of course, he let his parents pick his housing accommodations for college, everyone thought he was too much of spaz to do anything right. He noticed four other cars already in the driveway, and his heart stammered. Was he the last one? What if his roommates thought he was a lazy person for being last? What if they already were all friends and wanted him gone already? His hands shook as he took a sip of coffee and a deep breath before grabbing his backpack and hopping out of his beat up old Subaru.'

  
Tweek remembers a distinct wave of relief washing over him when he first met his new roommates. They were a little strange; not nearly as weird as him, but they each had distinct quirks that made their house feel like a home. There was Stan, an average looking boy with short, wavy black hair, blue and red beanie firmly covering it at all times. He had a laidback demeanor about him and everyone and everything was referred to as ‘dude.’ He was planted on the couch, Playstation already plugged in and battling another boy, who Tweek could tell had been next to him his whole life. Kyle had a mess of red curls that always stayed tucked up under a lime green ushanka and spoke articulately about everything. He was politer in his greeting than Stan’s ‘sup, dude’, putting down his controller to give a warm welcome and a firm handshake. Tweek noticed a Star of David necklace peek out from under the collar of his shirt and breathed a sigh of relief, he wasn’t a Mormon. Kyle took him to the kitchen were Kenny was putting away some boxes of plates and cutlery. The boy was wearing an orange jacket, with the hood up, and when he initially spoke, Tweek couldn’t understand a word of what he said. That made Tweek’s heart speed up, how was he supposed to live with someone that he couldn’t understand?

  
Kyle seemed to understand everything he said perfectly though, laughing in response and leading Tweek to believe those two had been friends a while as well. The boy finally turned around and pulled down the hood, revealing kind blue eyes, a shock of messy blonde hair, and a mischievous smirk.  
“So you’re the final roommate, huh?” the boy, Kenny, asked.

  
Tweek was afraid of sounding stupid, he knew his strange jittering and twitches must have already had them judging him, so he kept his mouth shut and instead gave a quick nod.

  
“Welcome to the madness,” Kenny chuckled, “It’s just us here alone, so you better get used to us!” Kyle rolled his eyes before leading Tweek towards the hallway where their bedrooms were.

  
“This is Stan and I’s room,” Kyle motioned to a door half open. The inside revealed two bare twin mattresses laying on the floor and boxes stacked haphazardly around the room. “That’s yours’ and Kenny’s room,” he motioned to the room right across from them. The door was shut and Kyle pushed it open, showing one bare half of the room, the other wasn’t lavishly decorated, but was unpacked and clean. One twin bed, on a frame, made neatly, one bedside table, with just a picture of a Kenny and a girl who looked almost identical to him, with a little bit darker hair, one dresser, toiletries neatly lined up on the top, a NASCAR poster hung on the wall above his bed, and a lamp.

  
“Ken didn’t have much growing up and his house was a pigsty, so he really likes things to be kept neat,” Kyle explained lowly to Tweek. “If it’s a problem, I’d be happy to switch, and you can room with Stan.”

“No! Gah! I mean, I don’t mind! I can be clean!” Tweek rushed out, looking at the wall instead of Kyle’s face.

  
“Okay, dude, if you’re sure,” Kyle affirmed, gently patting his shoulder. He turned and kept padding down the hall. “Here’s the bathroom, and that’s Craig’s room.”  
The door to the room was shut and Kyle knocked once, politely. A few moments later, the door opened to reveal a giant. Tweek’s heart hammered in his chest as he tilted his head back to look up at his easily six-foot roommate. His hair was covered by a blue chullo, one tiny yellow pom-pom on top, Tweek made a mental note to ask why they always wore hats, and his face was set in an expression of complete disinterest.

  
“What.” Craig asked in a monotonous, nasally voice. With the infliction of tone, Tweek wasn’t sure if that counted as a question.

  
“Hey, dude,” Kyle gave him a smile that said he was used to this kind of attitude, “Our new roommate finally got here.”

  
His choice of words made Tweek feel guilty. Had they been waiting around all day? Was that why this Craig guy didn’t like him? Did they all know each other before this? That was way too much pressure for him. He let out a little “ack!” and Kyle looked at him in concern but Craig’s eyes slide to him, the same expression on his face, never once showing any other emotion.

  
“Okay.” He replied.

  
“I-I’m Tweek!” Tweek stammered out, still feeling like the odd man out.

  
“Okay.” Craig repeated.

  
Tweek started to sweat and tug at strands of his frazzled blonde hair as Craig stared at him, like he could see into his soul. Kyle interrupted this awkward welcome and steered Tweek back down the hallway. He offered his and Stan’s services to help him unpack his car, but Tweek was afraid of causing anymore burden to them today. He opted to grab his comforter and a pillow from his car and retreated to his and Kenny’s room to crash on the floor. As he fitfully drifted to sleep, dark blue eyes burned into the back of his mind.


	2. It's Just the Five of Us

That was then and this was now. A few weeks later, Tweek felt considerably better about his living situation and his new friends. He had become accustomed to Kenny’s perverted sense of humor, Kyle’s nagging worries, Stan’s laidback attitude, and Craig’s frosty persona. The latter still bugged him sometimes, but otherwise, the two peacefully co-existed and dare he say, maybe even liked each other?

He was finishing up a phone call with his mother who asked him the usual questions like, “Are you sleeping well?” to which he responded, “Yes, mom, it’s great.” Even though he stayed up too late most nights, running off a plethora of anxiety and caffeine.

“Are you eating right?”

“Yes, mom, I’m even eating my vegetables.” That one was the truth. Kyle always nagged him that he was too thin and always bulked up his plate at dinner.

He hung up shortly after and the silence was quickly interrupted by Stan bursting into the room shortly followed by Kenny and even Kyle, all laughing and holding plastic grocery bags.

“C’mon, dude! Party in the living room!” Stan enthused. The rest of the boys enthusiastically agreed and Tweek heard them barge down the hallway to bang on Craig’s door. He didn’t want to be the odd man out so he quickly headed to the living room, accepting the beers that Stan pushed into his arms as he went to take a seat on their couch.

“Tucker, if you don’t get your ass out here, we’re releasing your Guinea pig into the wild next time you leave the house!” Kenny called out.

A few moments later, Craig was standing at the entrance to the living room, eyes dark and brows twisted with annoyance. He flipped everyone off before slinking over to the open seat next to Tweek and gracefully catching the beer Stan threw at him. Tweek let out a little squawk, because that could have hit him. Eventually, the boys all settled down as more alcohol flowed through their systems, raunchy games of Never Have I Ever sliding into a more calm, heartfelt environment.

“C-can we just promise each of this one little thing?” Stan slurred. His eyes were narrowed, like he was having a hard time seeing everyone and more of his dark hair was sticking out from underneath his beanie that was wrinkling up towards the crown of his head. His shoulders were hunched forward and he made big, swooping arm movements before letting them fall heavily to his sides again.

“What, bro?” Kenny asked, slightly less intoxicated, letting his parka hang open, never having taken it off after getting back inside the house.

“Let’s just be best friends until the end! Okay, dudes?” he looked emotional as he said this, eyes welling up and he leaned over into Kyle who was sitting next to him.

“Sure thing, buddy,” he chuckled, fixing his hat for him.

Everyone gave a little laugh and gave some form of agreement, including Craig, and for some reason, Tweek felt like he was never the kind of person to say something like that lightly, even if he was a little drunk.

The night continued, more drinks being consumed until Tweek felt firmly in a bubble of hazy contentment. Somehow, the boys ended up sitting in a circle, with an empty liquor bottle listing menacingly in the middle. Normally, Tweek’s anxiety would have had him screaming in his room, but Drunk Tweek was better than that, he told himself.

“Craig, you first dude!” Stan slurred and pointed across the table to taller boy.

“Whatever,” he replied. With the exception of the occasional slur or stumble, you would never have been able to tell he had drank Tweek’s body weight in alcohol that night. His big, steady hand reached out and spun the bottle and he let his eyes drift closed for a moment. If Tweek hadn’t of known better, he could’ve sworn it was a prayer. He highly doubted Craig believed in something like God; he didn’t seem to believe in much.

Tweek watched the bottle spin and looked up at Craig’s pretty midnight blue eyes. He wondered how many eyes those hearts had broken unknowingly and probably on purpose as well. Craig wasn’t the type to mince words and more than likely told girls who were dying to trust him to fuck right off. He was so lost in thought that he didn’t even notice when those eyes looked at him and started moving towards him. He had a heart attack when he realized the bottle had chosen him and Craig was moving across the circle to kiss him.

Tweek’s face flushed and his brain melted; he had never kissed anyone before. He considered getting up and running but Drunk Tweek was better than that, he wouldn’t resist the day. He couldn’t resist the day. He closed his eyes and wasn’t quite sure what to do with his lips so he puffed them up and a bit and waited. Finally, a chapped set of lips set in indifference touched his, lightly, almost like a caress, lingering there for a moment and then they were gone. He tried not to think about it too much when his kiss with Kenny, straight a nail, self-proclaimed pussy addict, _Kenny_ turned into a steamier gay affair, complete with tongue and a crotch grab that made the other boys cheer. He ignored the sting in his stomach thinking about it that night, Kyle cuddled up to his feet on the couch. The kiss had sobered him up immensely. It was fine, he thought, swallowing feelings of resentment, if he were Craig, he wouldn’t like himself much either.


	3. I'm So Excited I Haven't Spoken

Two weekends later and it was the beginning of August. The boys, now having part-time jobs and establishing themselves in this town, caught the party bug, once again. Tweek reasoned with himself that this was fairly normal, they were college students after all. They didn’t live in on campus housing anymore and were of the legal age to drink, so who cared. He could use something to relieve the tension of his new job, anyways. It wasn’t much, just a part-time gig at an indie coffee shop around the corner; he got free coffee and the customers weren’t too strenuous but it was still pressure and Tweek never faired very well under that. A nag in his stomach told him to find a reason to be gone the night of the party, especially once he found out that Craig had invited someone.

Not that Tweek cared who they all hung out with outside their house, now with them having jobs, they all were branching out and inviting different people into their house. It’s just, this was different. He only requested to invite one person. And she was a girl. Tweek tried not to think too much about that and instead focused on his work, offering an invitation to two of the guys he worked with. Clyde wasn’t the sharpest tool in the shed and tended to care more about his hair and sports than being a productive member of the team, but nevertheless he was kind and talked to Tweek like they had been friends for years. The other was a man that deserved to be working as a Harvard professor rather than at a coffee shop. Token was smart and well dressed and made every statement sound like a master’s thesis. Tweek felt dumb talking to him, but Token was kind, too and graciously accepted his quirks. The boys both agreed to come along and Tweek felt a pressure lift at not being the only person to not have a guest to invite.

The night of the party, Tweek was so nervous, he changed his shirt four times before settling on a hunter green button-up and a pair of black jeans. He attempted to flatten out his wild blonde hair but quickly gave up knowing that as soon as something stressed him out he would tug at it. He texted Clyde their address and went out to help the guys set up. It wasn’t supposed to be a rager, Stan and Kenny promised him that, but they still wanted it to be fun. The guys had stocked up on junk food and alcohol, placing it haphazardly throughout the bungalow. Kenny had stayed up late last night with Kyle, deciding on the perfect playlist and there was an energy of excitement thrumming through the house, with the exception of Craig who hadn’t even come out of his room since he slinked in from work.

Once the party was in full swing, Tweek was glad that the boys had talked him into it. It was nice getting to meet everybody’s friends and drink and Clyde had even pulled him up from the couch to dance to a Beyoncé song that made everybody laugh and dance along. As much as he hated to admit it, the girl Craig had brought, Jenny, was even nice and fit in well. Kenny switched the song to one that Tweek had heard practically every time he turned on the radio this summer and Jenny screamed out, grabbing two girls Stan had invited, Wendy and Bebe and the three ran to dance in their living room. She seemed so genuinely happy to be there and dancing, Tweek couldn’t find it in himself to hate her. He watched for a minute as they danced, Jenny’s abundant happiness and energy going on and on.

Later, he found himself alone with Craig and the two were comfortably drunk. Tweek hadn’t really had a chance to talk to him since the kiss incident, whether they were too busy or avoiding each other, neither mentioned it. Either way, now they’re cozied up on the couch, talking and Craig is speaking to him this voice that makes his insides puddle and he’s counted about three smiles now and he’s so happy he’s worried he might sprout wings and fly. Craig shares an anecdote about Kyle and his persistent hemorrhoids and beer comes shooting out his nose at the inside joke. He’s so excited to be talking to the taller boy that in an ironic twist of events, he hasn’t spoken. Their conversation get interrupted by a very drunk Jenny falling into Craig’s lap, circling thin arms around his neck. Even sweaty from drinking and dancing, she’s obviously a very naturally pretty girl and Tweek finds himself envying her effortless beauty. She slides seamlessly into the conversation and when she speaks she sounds so sure, Tweek feels that she could talk him into walking right off a bridge without second thought.  In that moment, maybe it’s the alcohol, or the return of his courageous alter ego, Drunk Tweek, but he knows he’s more clever than her, somebody that Craig can connect to and he feels hope when Craig gently declines her subtle offers to retreat to his room.

Later that night, Tweek and Craig find themselves sitting out on the patio that’s connected to Craig’s room. The party had died down considerably, Tweek having bade a very drunk Clyde and a sobered up Token a farewell at least an hour ago. Tweek had been amazed passing through Craig’s room, even drunk and dark, he saw the model solar systems set up and the glow stars hanging from the ceiling. Outside on the bench that apparently was already there when they moved in, next to a big, expensive looking telescope, the two sat quietly, enjoying the warm summer night signaling summer was still in bloom. Tweek looked up at Craig as a cool breeze swept past them and shivered.

“Summer’s ending soon,” he noted, voice softer than normal, but still not betraying a hint of emotion.

Tweek didn’t respond, he just let Drunk Tweek take over and slide his hand across the bench, trapping a big, calloused one in his.  


	4. I'll Hold Onto your Secrets

The two boys sat outside that night and talked for hours. Drunk Tweek had long ago gone back into hiding, but still, Craig’s hand was wrapped tightly in his. Tweek stared in amazement as Craig talked to him about anything and everything, and couldn’t wrap his mind around how Craig’s eyes shone brighter than the stars. Whenever he would talk about a subject that was particularly enthralling to him like outer space or technology, they twinkled even and his hands waved in a big show of explanation. He always returned his hand back to Tweek though, scooping it up gently again and rubbing a rough thumb over the soft skin like an apology for letting go. 

Tweek knew he was fucked. It made his heart pound and his pupils dilate to think that this was really happening. Craig Tucker, the King of Apathy was sitting here talking to him like he was the only person in the world that mattered. What if this was all a trap or something? What if at the end of the night, everyone came outside to laugh at him for being stupid enough to ever think that Craig Tucker would like him? 

But Craig wasn’t like that, though. He tried to remind himself this sternly. Even if he was cut and dry to the point of being an asshole, he had always been a sincere, transparent person. He wasn’t one for playing mean tricks.

It’s alright, Tweek soothes himself. Besides, it was nice not to be so alone. Not that being in the house had made him feel alone; it was actually quite the opposite. For the first time in his entire life he felt like he belonged somewhere. Like he had found his tribe. 

Eventually, the sun began to peek over the horizon and every one of their sentences became punctuated with yawns. Tweek began to feel anxious that Craig was staying awake just to make him feel better and was the one to suggest getting some rest. Craig readily agreed, standing up to stretch and Tweek blushed at the strip of tanned stomach that peeked from underneath the hemline of his shirt before standing himself and averting his eyes. He hoped Craig hadn’t noticed his sudden awkwardness. Craig walked him back through his room and it still held that same magic even in the early morning light. Stripe wheeked happily at their entrance, standing on the bars of his cage in the hopes of getting a treat and Tweek smiled warmly at the tiny rodent before looking back at Craig. 

Craig’s eyes held a warmth as well and it made Tweek’s insides turn to goo. Here was a big, hulking man who never showed the slightest bit of empathy towards any other human being, practically cooing at a guinea pig. Tweek was so in love with him that it.

When Tweek finally got situated into bed, that gooey warm feeling still hadn’t dissipated and he felt like he was riding an adrenaline high. He had seen so many personal, private parts of Craig’s life and personality that night. It was like eating the rich center of a truffle and Tweek was addicted. He wanted more. He hoped Craig would trust him enough to give him more. 

Don’t worry Craig, I’ll hold onto your secrets, Tweek affirmed to himself.


	5. Maybe I'm A Little Bit Over My Head

Maybe Tweek was in a little bit over his head. They hadn’t exactly put a label on it yet, but it felt like what Tweek imagined a relationship would. Every waking second that wasn’t being dedicated to work or preparing for the impending school year was spent with Craig. He never mentioned Jenny again and Tweek didn’t ask. 

The two boys had become almost inseparable quickly. They could usually be found in Craig’s room, laying in his twin size bed, smooshed into an impossible amount of space for two full grown men, but Tweek didn’t mind it as much as he once would have. Instead of worrying if he smelled or was making Craig uncomfortable, he allowed himself the little joys of being pressed so closely into Craig’s personal space inside of his private sanctuary. 

The two boys would talk and stare at the glow stars, or sometimes into each other’s eyes, and sometimes that would lead to kisses. Which Tweek didn’t mind that much either. At first, it had been a nerve-racking, shaky affair. He would panic and overthink the situation so badly that they ended up bumping noses and clacking teeth or somebody would get an elbow to the stomach or a knee to the crotch. Tweek would get even more scared that Craig would hate what a bad kisser he was and ask him to leave, but the taller boy never did. He was kind, and gentle, and patient. He kissed him again, and again until they had it down to a perfect science. 

Tweek couldn’t decide if that was more because he was a perfectionist with an analytical mind, or because he genuinely liked Tweek enough to want to keep kissing him. He figured it was probably a fair mixture of both. Either way, Tweek was thoroughly addicted and slightly dependent on Craig for his sanity and happiness. This was a dangerous thing, he reminded himself every night he actually went to sleep in his own bed, but the rarely functioning rational part of his brain was predictably ignored.

Craig was just so captivating and Tweek needed to hear his stories of his childhood misdeeds, or the cute thing Stripe had done last week like he needed oxygen. He just came undone at the things he said. Craig had a surprising sense of humor as well that Tweek was surprised he had never picked up on before. Tweek couldn’t blame himself too much though, because Craig’s sense of humor was drier than white wine and Tweek had crippling anxiety that made distinguishing sarcasm next to impossible in strangers. Still, that night as Craig relayed an anecdote about Stan pushing a door that had been marked ‘Pull’, Tweek was gasping for breath in between laughs, pushing his face into the warm, Red Racer, shirt that covered Craig’s chest. He was so happy, it hurt. And that scared the shit out of him.  
Tweek had noticed that he wasn’t the only one in love either. When he and Craig did spend time out in the living room, which they didn’t do often because of the incessant cat calls of Tweek’s lovely roommate, Kenny, he could see it as a clear as day. 

Stan had met a girl at the veterinary office he worked for and she was heartbreakingly gorgeous. She was full of spunk and charm, working every room she was in like a seasoned politician. It was nearly impossible to dislike Wendy. Unless you were Kyle Broflovski. The two were amicable and polite towards each other, but Tweek always had a sixth sense in terms of being able to tell when a person wasn’t being genuine. Whenever Wendy was around, Kyle was not. 

Stan seemed to understand that too, and that made it even worse to Tweek. They were all in love, Tweek mused one night, watching their previously uncomplicated friend group interact. There were beers scattered across empty surfaces and the Playstation was loudly blaring Call of Duty, but the room that should had been filled with loud chatter and laughter was dull. With the exception of Kenny, who appeared to be completely unflappable and in love with a new girl every day. Tweek just prayed to God that he would never lose these people, and feared that at the end of all of this they would all be hurt.


End file.
